today has finally arrived.
mummy, i'm proud of your courage to finally decide to do this.
you must believe that it is for the greater good.
i know you must be in so much pain and fear.
but yet, you are trying and have been trying to contain it all within yourself. as you always do.
i'm sorry i can't be there with you mum. but you must believe we're there beside you, wishing you strength and hope.
i'm praying for your safety and the success of the operation.
be strong mummy.
i'll see you soon.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
out of it
fed-up would best describe how i feel today.
bad sucky start to my morning.
so she fell down the stairs, now she's limping worst than ever before.
in a span of 2 days again she decided to be fickle-minded.
what is so difficult about it, i just don't get it.
now its his turn to be unwell. stressed from all the unnecessary drama she has been giving him.
im glad he is not as stubborn
i did tell him today, that i'm very very proud of him to remain cool and patient thru it all.
but unfortunately, those are just words. the damage is done.
now his health is paying for it - unknowingly.
everyone is aging. and there's no way to stop it.
i hate to see them in this poor state of their being.
so fragile.
just the other night, i was out with them buying groceries for church, when i saw him carry all those heavy stuffs, he tripped n almost knocked himself. but thankfully, he didnt.
thats when she passed a comment saying that he's drunk.
n so i told her off very quickly... he's not drunk. theres no way he cud be bcos he didnt even have a drop of alcohol. he's just OLD.
indeed, OLD is the word.
AGING too perhaps.
it's time to face it.
as cool & calm as i'm trying to be, as objective as i try to remain,
somethings are just not within my control all the time.
mood & emotions are terribly volatile of late.
no matter what, i'm thankful for my girlfriends.
i know i can talk to them and be comforted.
and i'm glad they understand me.
bad sucky start to my morning.
so she fell down the stairs, now she's limping worst than ever before.
in a span of 2 days again she decided to be fickle-minded.
what is so difficult about it, i just don't get it.
now its his turn to be unwell. stressed from all the unnecessary drama she has been giving him.
im glad he is not as stubborn
i did tell him today, that i'm very very proud of him to remain cool and patient thru it all.
but unfortunately, those are just words. the damage is done.
now his health is paying for it - unknowingly.
everyone is aging. and there's no way to stop it.
i hate to see them in this poor state of their being.
so fragile.
just the other night, i was out with them buying groceries for church, when i saw him carry all those heavy stuffs, he tripped n almost knocked himself. but thankfully, he didnt.
thats when she passed a comment saying that he's drunk.
n so i told her off very quickly... he's not drunk. theres no way he cud be bcos he didnt even have a drop of alcohol. he's just OLD.
indeed, OLD is the word.
AGING too perhaps.
it's time to face it.
as cool & calm as i'm trying to be, as objective as i try to remain,
somethings are just not within my control all the time.
mood & emotions are terribly volatile of late.
no matter what, i'm thankful for my girlfriends.
i know i can talk to them and be comforted.
and i'm glad they understand me.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
heart-full
here i am again, about to rant.
good ol' trusty blog, my all time favourite sounding board =)
just hope it doesnt hate me for always typing out my random thots & feelings
well it's 5 days to mum's op.
ya ok fine, im worried and not the most positive of people now, admittedly.
keep wondering how things will be like when she'll be in bed most of the time...
it's at times like this that i realise how i've taken my mum for granted all these years...
just a woman at home who's got hardly any ambition -
who'll just wake up early everyday;
talk to her daughters or nag at them in the morning;
watch us get ready for work;
send us out the door;
start her day with prayers;
moving on to chores ard the house (cleaning, washing, ironing);
have lunch alone;
occasionally go grocery shopping alone;
carry all the heavy groceries alone;
chat up with her sis or mum;
watch her soap operas in the late afternoon alone;
prepare dinner;
wait for her husband to come home;
cook dinner;
wash up;
watch some more tv;
wait for her daughters to come home;
say her prayers and go to bed.
yup. that pretty much sums up her life on a daily basis.
exciting isnt it?
i just want everything to turn out well.
mum to be happy with her op and the outcome - that she wont be in excruciating pain
that she'll be ok...
that the rest of us at home can get our act together and not have to clean up after one another.
it's time to show some "family spirit" ard here now.
above all, i just wish for mum to stay positive no matter what.
only we know how much courage it took for her to agree to this.
i must focus on the objective. and remain focused.
my family's the top priority right now and im not going to let anything change that.
good ol' trusty blog, my all time favourite sounding board =)
just hope it doesnt hate me for always typing out my random thots & feelings
well it's 5 days to mum's op.
ya ok fine, im worried and not the most positive of people now, admittedly.
keep wondering how things will be like when she'll be in bed most of the time...
it's at times like this that i realise how i've taken my mum for granted all these years...
just a woman at home who's got hardly any ambition -
who'll just wake up early everyday;
talk to her daughters or nag at them in the morning;
watch us get ready for work;
send us out the door;
start her day with prayers;
moving on to chores ard the house (cleaning, washing, ironing);
have lunch alone;
occasionally go grocery shopping alone;
carry all the heavy groceries alone;
chat up with her sis or mum;
watch her soap operas in the late afternoon alone;
prepare dinner;
wait for her husband to come home;
cook dinner;
wash up;
watch some more tv;
wait for her daughters to come home;
say her prayers and go to bed.
yup. that pretty much sums up her life on a daily basis.
exciting isnt it?
i just want everything to turn out well.
mum to be happy with her op and the outcome - that she wont be in excruciating pain
that she'll be ok...
that the rest of us at home can get our act together and not have to clean up after one another.
it's time to show some "family spirit" ard here now.
above all, i just wish for mum to stay positive no matter what.
only we know how much courage it took for her to agree to this.
i must focus on the objective. and remain focused.
my family's the top priority right now and im not going to let anything change that.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Pass Me Not
have i neglected God?
i have.
has my faith waivered?
i hope not.
i found my daily Gospel underneath a pile of work papers & other booklets...
why should i only turn to God when i'm feeling down.
this is so hypocritical.
this song best describes how i'm feeling. it represents my thoughts.
i over it unto Him.
Pass me not, O gentle Savior,
Hear my humble cry;
While on others Thou art calling,
Do not pass me by.
Refrain:
Savior, Savior, Hear my humble cry;
While on others Thou art calling,
Do not pass me by.
Let me at Thy throne of mercy
Find a sweet relief,
Kneeling there in deep contrition;
Help my unbelief.
i have.
has my faith waivered?
i hope not.
i found my daily Gospel underneath a pile of work papers & other booklets...
why should i only turn to God when i'm feeling down.
this is so hypocritical.
this song best describes how i'm feeling. it represents my thoughts.
i over it unto Him.
Pass me not, O gentle Savior,
Hear my humble cry;
While on others Thou art calling,
Do not pass me by.
Refrain:
Savior, Savior, Hear my humble cry;
While on others Thou art calling,
Do not pass me by.
Let me at Thy throne of mercy
Find a sweet relief,
Kneeling there in deep contrition;
Help my unbelief.
The Law of the Garbage Truck
How often do you let other people’s nonsense change your mood?
Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss or an insensitive employee ruin your day?
Unless you’re the Terminator, you’re probably set back on your heels.
However, the mark of your success is how quickly you can refocus on what’s important.
Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson.
And I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here’s what happened:
I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when all of a sudden a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, the car skidded, the tires squealed and at the last moment the car stopped just one inch from the other car’s back-end.
And what did we see next? The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started swearing at us. How do I know? Ask any New Yorker, some words in New York come with a special face.
And then here’s what blew me away. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, "Why did you just do that!? This guy could have killed us!" And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck™"
He said: Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And if you let them, they’ll dump it on you. So when someone wants to dump on you, don’t take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well and move on. Believe me. You’ll be happier.
So I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me?
And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home or on the street? It was then that I said, "I don’t want the garbage and I’m not going to spread it anymore."
I began to see Garbage Trucks. Like in the movie "The Sixth Sense," where the little boy said, "I see Dead People." Well now "I see Garbage Trucks."
I see the load they’re carrying. I see them coming to drop it off. And like my taxi driver, I don’t take it personally; I just smile, wave, wish them well and move on.
The bottom line is that successful people do not let Garbage Trucks take over their day. What about you? What would happen in your life, starting today, if you let more Garbage Trucks pass you by?
And my taxi driver was right. I am happier.
Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss or an insensitive employee ruin your day?
Unless you’re the Terminator, you’re probably set back on your heels.
However, the mark of your success is how quickly you can refocus on what’s important.
Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson.
And I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here’s what happened:
I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when all of a sudden a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, the car skidded, the tires squealed and at the last moment the car stopped just one inch from the other car’s back-end.
And what did we see next? The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started swearing at us. How do I know? Ask any New Yorker, some words in New York come with a special face.
And then here’s what blew me away. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, "Why did you just do that!? This guy could have killed us!" And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck™"
He said: Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And if you let them, they’ll dump it on you. So when someone wants to dump on you, don’t take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well and move on. Believe me. You’ll be happier.
So I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me?
And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home or on the street? It was then that I said, "I don’t want the garbage and I’m not going to spread it anymore."
I began to see Garbage Trucks. Like in the movie "The Sixth Sense," where the little boy said, "I see Dead People." Well now "I see Garbage Trucks."
I see the load they’re carrying. I see them coming to drop it off. And like my taxi driver, I don’t take it personally; I just smile, wave, wish them well and move on.
The bottom line is that successful people do not let Garbage Trucks take over their day. What about you? What would happen in your life, starting today, if you let more Garbage Trucks pass you by?
And my taxi driver was right. I am happier.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
it's all his fault
recent happenings has brought me to this conclusion.
as much as i understand the sense of belonging and the need to control, how much can you seriously control and watch over?
how much more problems/issues must you cause to understand that YOU are the real cause of everyone's confusion and increase in stress & workload?!
sure as hell doesn't take a genius to figure that out.
sigh. what a pain.
upset all the operations and cause us grief. replying emails that don't provide anything close to a solution.
as poor thing as i somehow think you are.
we are also victims of your "little" long staged play.
*shakes head and sighs at the same time* - over and over again
as much as i understand the sense of belonging and the need to control, how much can you seriously control and watch over?
how much more problems/issues must you cause to understand that YOU are the real cause of everyone's confusion and increase in stress & workload?!
sure as hell doesn't take a genius to figure that out.
sigh. what a pain.
upset all the operations and cause us grief. replying emails that don't provide anything close to a solution.
as poor thing as i somehow think you are.
we are also victims of your "little" long staged play.
*shakes head and sighs at the same time* - over and over again
Thursday, March 05, 2009
less drama
i am thankful for a stable and normal week thus far.
hardly any drama this week.
i conclude that the recipe to a productive and efficient person is when he/she is in a good mood - unaffected by external negative factors. of course, that is hardly possible no matter how resilient a person can try to be.
nevertheless, i am just glad that all is fine now.
feeling so tired. just need to sleep =.=
all the rain and wind is making me lazy, and also causing my shoulder to ache.
crappologies.
hardly any drama this week.
i conclude that the recipe to a productive and efficient person is when he/she is in a good mood - unaffected by external negative factors. of course, that is hardly possible no matter how resilient a person can try to be.
nevertheless, i am just glad that all is fine now.
feeling so tired. just need to sleep =.=
all the rain and wind is making me lazy, and also causing my shoulder to ache.
crappologies.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
A Different Approach to Fasting
1. Fast from anger and hatred - Give your family and friends an extra dose of love each day
2. Fast from judging others - Before making any judgments, recall how Jesus overlooks our faults.
3. Fast from discouragement - Hold on to Jesus' promise that He has a perfect plan for your life.
4. Fast from complaining - When you find yourself about to complain, close your eyes and recall some of the little moments of joy Jesus has given you.
5. Fast from resentment or bitterness - Work on forgiving those who may have hurt you.
6. Fast from spending too much money - Try to reduce your spending by ten percent and give those savings to the poor.
2. Fast from judging others - Before making any judgments, recall how Jesus overlooks our faults.
3. Fast from discouragement - Hold on to Jesus' promise that He has a perfect plan for your life.
4. Fast from complaining - When you find yourself about to complain, close your eyes and recall some of the little moments of joy Jesus has given you.
5. Fast from resentment or bitterness - Work on forgiving those who may have hurt you.
6. Fast from spending too much money - Try to reduce your spending by ten percent and give those savings to the poor.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
same story, different day
it hasn't even been done yet.
one month seems like such a long way more - it seems like forever. somehow.
but everday it's the same story, different day.
i'm exhausted. really.
emotionally, mentally and physically.
how am i to cope?
as much as i can't expect her to understand what i'm going through but why are our feelings being neglected?
i understand her fears. does she understand mine?
i know how she feels. does she know how i feel?
God, please help me.
i'm on a sinking ship and i really don't know what to do anymore.
how am i to make her understand and see the objectives?
please help me. i can't afford to lose my faith now. not now.
one month seems like such a long way more - it seems like forever. somehow.
but everday it's the same story, different day.
i'm exhausted. really.
emotionally, mentally and physically.
how am i to cope?
as much as i can't expect her to understand what i'm going through but why are our feelings being neglected?
i understand her fears. does she understand mine?
i know how she feels. does she know how i feel?
God, please help me.
i'm on a sinking ship and i really don't know what to do anymore.
how am i to make her understand and see the objectives?
please help me. i can't afford to lose my faith now. not now.
Monday, February 09, 2009
hope.
Four candles in a dark room burn slowly. The ambience was soft, so soft you could hear their thoughts.
The first one said: “I am Peace. However, nobody can keep me lit. I believe I will go out.” Its flame rapidly diminishes and goes out completely.
The second one says: “I am Faith. Most of all, I am no longer indispensable, so it doesn’t make sense that I stay lit.” When it finished talking, a soft breeze blew on it, putting it out.
Sadly, the third candle spoke in its turn: “I am Love. I haven’t got the strength to stay lit. People put me aside and don’t understand my importance. They even forget to love those who are nearest to them.” And waiting no longer, it flickers and dies.
Suddenly, a child enters the room and sees three candles not burning. “Why are you not burning? You are supposed to stay lit till the end.” Saying this, the child begins to sob.
Then the fourth candle said: “Don’t be afraid. While I am still burning, we can relight the other candles, for I am Hope!”
With shining eyes, the child took the candle of hope and lit the other candles.
Even when you seem to lose all else, always keep the flame of hope burning within you.
The first one said: “I am Peace. However, nobody can keep me lit. I believe I will go out.” Its flame rapidly diminishes and goes out completely.
The second one says: “I am Faith. Most of all, I am no longer indispensable, so it doesn’t make sense that I stay lit.” When it finished talking, a soft breeze blew on it, putting it out.
Sadly, the third candle spoke in its turn: “I am Love. I haven’t got the strength to stay lit. People put me aside and don’t understand my importance. They even forget to love those who are nearest to them.” And waiting no longer, it flickers and dies.
Suddenly, a child enters the room and sees three candles not burning. “Why are you not burning? You are supposed to stay lit till the end.” Saying this, the child begins to sob.
Then the fourth candle said: “Don’t be afraid. While I am still burning, we can relight the other candles, for I am Hope!”
With shining eyes, the child took the candle of hope and lit the other candles.
Even when you seem to lose all else, always keep the flame of hope burning within you.
Sunday, February 08, 2009
mutual understanding
life would be a lot less complicated if people took a step back every now and then to realise that they should understand people or each other more.
then again, i have since long ago concluded that nothing i do is ever good enough.
surely, someone has smthg to say abt something in my life.
else, they just get upset at me and i'm suppose to be a psychic and read the signs.
it seems to me, that it is an evil occurance to be close to someone, anyone.
and it's all because of expectations.
pple dun seem to want to cut each other some slack these days.
and pple dun give each other enough credit for the things they do.
humans are such that they thrive on picking on the misdeeds.
but whatever the case is, it just isn't suppose to be difficult or painful isnt it?
what's the point of making life so complicated and frustrating for one another?
and he said i have been so tensed lately.
no prizes for guessing why huh?
everyday, every week is a same cycle.
same shit, different day.
so shouldn't we help each other get through life a little easier?
make each other smile more, as opposed to getting pissed off over minor petty matters?
as it is, it is sad enough that weekends have to end, and mondays arrive cos that means work day.
sundays are always the hardest to get by.
yet, who cares?
cos anyway, people assume that i have an endless supply of confidence, self-esteem and positivity.
but in fact, half the time, i deal with it myself.
i am my own cheer leader. i am my own perk-myself-upper.
to be honest, maybe i do know what the real problem is.
so maybe if i just got rid of myself, then i would stop feeling this way.
then again, sooner or later, i might just lose my mind.
i'm freakin' tired of pleasing the world.
surely this can't be the reason for my existence.
i need a sign. please.
then again, i have since long ago concluded that nothing i do is ever good enough.
surely, someone has smthg to say abt something in my life.
else, they just get upset at me and i'm suppose to be a psychic and read the signs.
it seems to me, that it is an evil occurance to be close to someone, anyone.
and it's all because of expectations.
pple dun seem to want to cut each other some slack these days.
and pple dun give each other enough credit for the things they do.
humans are such that they thrive on picking on the misdeeds.
but whatever the case is, it just isn't suppose to be difficult or painful isnt it?
what's the point of making life so complicated and frustrating for one another?
and he said i have been so tensed lately.
no prizes for guessing why huh?
everyday, every week is a same cycle.
same shit, different day.
so shouldn't we help each other get through life a little easier?
make each other smile more, as opposed to getting pissed off over minor petty matters?
as it is, it is sad enough that weekends have to end, and mondays arrive cos that means work day.
sundays are always the hardest to get by.
yet, who cares?
cos anyway, people assume that i have an endless supply of confidence, self-esteem and positivity.
but in fact, half the time, i deal with it myself.
i am my own cheer leader. i am my own perk-myself-upper.
to be honest, maybe i do know what the real problem is.
so maybe if i just got rid of myself, then i would stop feeling this way.
then again, sooner or later, i might just lose my mind.
i'm freakin' tired of pleasing the world.
surely this can't be the reason for my existence.
i need a sign. please.
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
impending disaster?
thought of the day:
if we keep comparing our current relationships to those of the past, that is truly a recipe for disaster.
why should there be a need to compare?
we are all individuals at the end of the day. no 2 people function in the exact same way.
as hard as we try to be objective most of the time, it's hard isn't it?
afterall, we are humans.
it's better to have loved, then never to have loved at all.
cliche but true.
learn to cherish those around you. be it your friends or significant other halves.
you'll never know when you might lose them - no warning signs, nothing.
live each day as it comes, be contented and thankful for all that you have.
just like procelain, relationships/friendships are extremely fragile.
once broken, no matter how hard you may try to mend it with teary eyes, things will just never be the same again.
you may even cry your eyes and lungs out, but will it matter anymore?
so don't do anything you might regret.
else, just be prepared to live with regret(s).
if we keep comparing our current relationships to those of the past, that is truly a recipe for disaster.
why should there be a need to compare?
we are all individuals at the end of the day. no 2 people function in the exact same way.
as hard as we try to be objective most of the time, it's hard isn't it?
afterall, we are humans.
it's better to have loved, then never to have loved at all.
cliche but true.
learn to cherish those around you. be it your friends or significant other halves.
you'll never know when you might lose them - no warning signs, nothing.
live each day as it comes, be contented and thankful for all that you have.
just like procelain, relationships/friendships are extremely fragile.
once broken, no matter how hard you may try to mend it with teary eyes, things will just never be the same again.
you may even cry your eyes and lungs out, but will it matter anymore?
so don't do anything you might regret.
else, just be prepared to live with regret(s).
Friday, January 30, 2009
men & women
a random 3-way conversation over MSN just occured between 2 of my colleagues and myself, which stirred some thought and shed some light to my otherwise stereotypical mindset...
ok so this is how it goes...
aestee says (3:44 PM):
err
he really a bit diff planet
l y d i a says (3:45 PM):
uh huhhh
aestee says (3:45 PM):
oh ya forgot men are frm mars
l y d i a says (3:45 PM):
yeshhh
Kyø - A real man never back down on his promises says (3:46 PM):
we are living on earth liao
lets not talk about the past
what Lionel says is true la.
we are living on planet earth and this means that there should be no difference between male & female; and that we should all learn to get along with each other for a change.
i know........ no matter what, we're all stuck in this stereotypical mindset of men are from mars and women are from venus.
but then the question goes back to: let's jolly well figure a way to get out of it then! =)
ok so this is how it goes...
aestee says (3:44 PM):
err
he really a bit diff planet
l y d i a says (3:45 PM):
uh huhhh
aestee says (3:45 PM):
oh ya forgot men are frm mars
l y d i a says (3:45 PM):
yeshhh
Kyø - A real man never back down on his promises says (3:46 PM):
we are living on earth liao
lets not talk about the past
what Lionel says is true la.
we are living on planet earth and this means that there should be no difference between male & female; and that we should all learn to get along with each other for a change.
i know........ no matter what, we're all stuck in this stereotypical mindset of men are from mars and women are from venus.
but then the question goes back to: let's jolly well figure a way to get out of it then! =)
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
CRAP drivers
i seriously can't stand (-> this is putting it VERY nicely already) those DUMB A** CRAP drivers on ECP every morning during the morning peak hours rush.
they should all just go back to Driving School or something!
why do people have to slow down whilst going up Benjamin Sheares bridge!?!?!?!?!
why why why?
i can't seem to see the logic in doing so.
don't they understand that due to their HORRIBLE driving skills & common sense, they hold back the traffic and cause a tail back all the way down to marine parade?!?!?!?!
this causes people to be frustrated so early in the morning & be late for work!
why must they be so dumb?
they are beyond description.
dumb, arrogant, selfish, ugly, kiasu, idoitic, annoying, cuckoo shit singaporean male driverssssssssssssss!
once you get up the Benjamin Sheares, guess what?!?!?!?!
THE TRAFFIC SUDDENLY CLEARS!
i stress the word - SUDDENLY.
also, Singaporean man (more like boys) are so damn bloody ungentlemanly.
seriously.
i hate to make such a sweeping statement.
but really, from uncles to yuppies, all CANNOT MAKE IT.
when they want to chap your lane, they don't care, they just simply anyhow squeeze their way through, not caring for your safety nor convenience.
why? because they are simply SELFISH. best part is, they don't even say thanks when you give way to them!!!
sigh sigh sigh.
so this morning, i met this super cannot-make-it white mitsubishi lancer (time to scrap ur damn old car dude) who didn't let me chap his lane to go to Rochor, (hope he gets his just desserts) speeded up just when i switched my left signal on!
wonderful isn't he?
world's nicest male driver award goes to him. definately. *rolls eyes*
sigh sigh sigh.
so hoppppppppping mad this morning!
arghhhh!
felt like just burning all of them.
burn people, burn!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i seriously need a loud hailer installed to my car.
they should all just go back to Driving School or something!
why do people have to slow down whilst going up Benjamin Sheares bridge!?!?!?!?!
why why why?
i can't seem to see the logic in doing so.
don't they understand that due to their HORRIBLE driving skills & common sense, they hold back the traffic and cause a tail back all the way down to marine parade?!?!?!?!
this causes people to be frustrated so early in the morning & be late for work!
why must they be so dumb?
they are beyond description.
dumb, arrogant, selfish, ugly, kiasu, idoitic, annoying, cuckoo shit singaporean male driverssssssssssssss!
once you get up the Benjamin Sheares, guess what?!?!?!?!
THE TRAFFIC SUDDENLY CLEARS!
i stress the word - SUDDENLY.
also, Singaporean man (more like boys) are so damn bloody ungentlemanly.
seriously.
i hate to make such a sweeping statement.
but really, from uncles to yuppies, all CANNOT MAKE IT.
when they want to chap your lane, they don't care, they just simply anyhow squeeze their way through, not caring for your safety nor convenience.
why? because they are simply SELFISH. best part is, they don't even say thanks when you give way to them!!!
sigh sigh sigh.
so this morning, i met this super cannot-make-it white mitsubishi lancer (time to scrap ur damn old car dude) who didn't let me chap his lane to go to Rochor, (hope he gets his just desserts) speeded up just when i switched my left signal on!
wonderful isn't he?
world's nicest male driver award goes to him. definately. *rolls eyes*
sigh sigh sigh.
so hoppppppppping mad this morning!
arghhhh!
felt like just burning all of them.
burn people, burn!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i seriously need a loud hailer installed to my car.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
guilt trips.
these are by far the best trips to be on isn't it?
people make you feel like the world's biggest idoit, say things to rub it in your face just when you're already feeling miserable.
is that a true attempt to help the situation or wad?
i don't get it.
maybe this is too high an order for me to comprehend.
i like to look and think the best of people. really i do.
but i can't do that all of the time.
i am human after all.
and i think i deserve some credit for that from time to time.
some allowance please?
how do you like to feel that anything you do is never gonna be good enough?
i just know that i can't seem to ever escape that ill-fate of being made to feel that way.
perhaps it is self-imposed.
shrugs. i don't know. can't tell.
things are not always easy to just speak your mind.
sometimes things just need to be internalised for a while.
in which case, i realised, i don't even know what's exactly wrong.
just don't feel comfortable.
like something is amiss.
simply hate that feeling.
but what to do, everyone goes through it don't they?
i know it'll make light someday but just not now because it's all gloom and doom at the moment.
do me a favour, whoever reads this, please don't ask me about it.
because honestly, i wouldn't know what to tell you either.
people make you feel like the world's biggest idoit, say things to rub it in your face just when you're already feeling miserable.
is that a true attempt to help the situation or wad?
i don't get it.
maybe this is too high an order for me to comprehend.
i like to look and think the best of people. really i do.
but i can't do that all of the time.
i am human after all.
and i think i deserve some credit for that from time to time.
some allowance please?
how do you like to feel that anything you do is never gonna be good enough?
i just know that i can't seem to ever escape that ill-fate of being made to feel that way.
perhaps it is self-imposed.
shrugs. i don't know. can't tell.
things are not always easy to just speak your mind.
sometimes things just need to be internalised for a while.
in which case, i realised, i don't even know what's exactly wrong.
just don't feel comfortable.
like something is amiss.
simply hate that feeling.
but what to do, everyone goes through it don't they?
i know it'll make light someday but just not now because it's all gloom and doom at the moment.
do me a favour, whoever reads this, please don't ask me about it.
because honestly, i wouldn't know what to tell you either.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
why do you even bother?
thought of the day is:
"why is there a need to deal with difficult people?"
2 ways to it.
think abt it positively or negatively.
unfortunately, the negative aspects seems to outshine the positive for me right now as i'm penning my thoughts.
"why do you even bother?"
shrugs. don't know.
just simply hate to keep second-guessing people.
sometimes feel i'm better for being a hermit for a while.
just to stay away from situations that catches my attention inevitably.
friendships, relationships, all the same.
both require love and effort.
so how if thats the case?
doesn't anybody strife to upkeep something called unconditional love?
then again, maybe upkeep isnt the correct word.
it's more like, doesn't anybody want to give out and receive unconditional love?
or does everyone simply don't believe in it anymore?
it's not always as simple as everyone thinks, to be the peace-maker.
if everyone can just learn to tolerate each other a bit more,
or to just be a little more thoughtful, kind, considerate, caring, tactful, loving, patient, forgiving, i seriously think the world will be much easier to live in and lives wouldn't have to be significantly shortened.
then again, that's just only my mentality i guess.
technically, the world is a lonely place.
it's me/you against the world.
"why is there a need to deal with difficult people?"
2 ways to it.
think abt it positively or negatively.
unfortunately, the negative aspects seems to outshine the positive for me right now as i'm penning my thoughts.
"why do you even bother?"
shrugs. don't know.
just simply hate to keep second-guessing people.
sometimes feel i'm better for being a hermit for a while.
just to stay away from situations that catches my attention inevitably.
friendships, relationships, all the same.
both require love and effort.
so how if thats the case?
doesn't anybody strife to upkeep something called unconditional love?
then again, maybe upkeep isnt the correct word.
it's more like, doesn't anybody want to give out and receive unconditional love?
or does everyone simply don't believe in it anymore?
it's not always as simple as everyone thinks, to be the peace-maker.
if everyone can just learn to tolerate each other a bit more,
or to just be a little more thoughtful, kind, considerate, caring, tactful, loving, patient, forgiving, i seriously think the world will be much easier to live in and lives wouldn't have to be significantly shortened.
then again, that's just only my mentality i guess.
technically, the world is a lonely place.
it's me/you against the world.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
